Tuesday, January 7, 2014
I've learned a lot of things since that Monday, June 10th, when I left my precious baby girl with a sitter and headed to the office. I have been very busy in that time, and perhaps, TrendSetterMom.com has not been updated as often as it should. The truth is that sometimes, I just don't have time between juggling my three main careers: Wage Earner, Wife, and Mother. I say "main" careers, because I hold many roles in this life. Those are just the three that use up the most of my time, and the three that are most important... although I believe I presented the order wrong the first time. Here they are in a better order:
1. Wife to Jonathan
2. Mother to Lucie (and since I'm carrying him now... Asher too!)
3. Import Entry Processor
Now, to anyone I work with who may read this... presenting my life in that order does not mean that I don't love my job. In fact, I do, and I will miss it terribly while I am on maternity leave (Don't worry, I WILL COME BACK!!!) I just know that if I did not work on my home life first, I'd be pretty miserable at my office job too.
I'd also like to point out that Mother is below Wife... but only slightly. That's because I take my relationship with my husband, the father to my children, very seriously. It's important that we are a united unit so that we can parent together- even if we do not always agree on whether or not Lucie deserves another cookie or candy cane, or when and for how long to put her in time out when she is misbehaving. Being happy with myself and my relationship with Jonathan is important to be able to be the best Mom I can be to Lucie and Asher. I may be a hormonal wreck with these pregnancy hormones lately, but Jonathan, I do appreciate you, and even though your sarcasm sometimes pisses me off, it's also the humor that made me fall in love with you.
What else have I learned?
Quantity of Time was traded in for Quality of Time. I was with Lucie 24/7 before I started my desk job, and I have to say that our time was not really QUALITY time, despite there being so much of it. I was bored, exhausted and disengaged from parenting. I was feeling hit with postpartum depression for quite some time before the move to South Carolina... but being in a new state, all by myself with Lucie (Jonathan was still in Alabama for work), with no extended family to help, I felt like I'd been hit by a truck.
Over about a month's time, I realized that I just wasn't cut out to be a Stay at Home Mom, and I'm here to tell you that that's okay! Upon realizing this, I immediately set out to find a sitter (I found Shannon on SitterCity and she was amazing until August when she went back to school and Lucie was transitioned to Day Care). Then, I applied to jobs. Within two weeks, I had had five interviews. Two were with staffing agencies, one was with the freight forwarder who eventually hired me, and the last two were with a truck broker.
The day after my freight forwarder interview, I went for a drug test and headed to the zoo with some moms from a local Meet Up Group. I couldn't believe my luck- just as we sat down to feed our kiddies a snack, the background check lady called. I would end up talking to that background check lady a total of 10 times the next two days, and then... I did not hear anything for a week. I started to get scared. Could one of my former employers have said something bad? I checked with H.R. at the forwarding company. She informed that they had delayed the new hire training class, but that they were very interested in me because of my background. Almost a month went by before I received my offer letter. I did a happy dance, signed it, and emailed it back immediately.
You see, in that month... I was holding out hope that this would be the job I would be hired for because I knew how much I would love it. In my interview, I had told the manager interviewing me how much work/life balance meant to me, and that I was a wife and a mother but also needed a career to be a well rounded person. I had been home for two years, and I was ready to get back into the workforce. The manager seemed to respond well to that, and had made a comment that people who are happy with their home life are usually the happiest people at work.
All throughout that month of waiting, I held Lucie a little tighter, made sure to spend as much time doing "fun" things as possible, and tried to be calm about not hearing anything. I realized that although I had interviewed for other places, working for this forwarder was really the only one of those jobs I wanted to take, because I truly felt comfortable at the interview. It would be three weeks between the day I accepted that job and the day I would start work. Although I was ready to go back to work, I was grateful to have that three weeks more to cherish my time home with Lucie.
I was a wreck the first day I left Lucie all day with the sitter. When I picked her up, she smiled, and she was okay.
Seven months later... sometimes she cries in the morning when I take her to day care, but like her Momma, she is not a morning person. She puts on this melodramatic act to let me know that she wants to spend time with me, and the minute I walk out the door to her class room, if I look back in through the window, she has happily changed her tune to playing with the other kids.
I've learned to be okay with that. She is happy, but she wants me to know that when I'm not there, she misses me. That's okay. When she does get to spend time with me, she appreciates me more, and I appreciate every snot filled tissue I wipe from her nose and every spilled sippy cup full of milk I have to clean up.
I'm here to tell you that it's okay. I'm okay. We're okay. Rejoining the work force does not make me any less of a mom, and being a mom doesn't mean I don't work as hard at my desk job. It just means that when it's time to punch out at the end of the day, I have an important place to be: picking up my daughter from day care. Watching her smile light up her face when I walk through that door makes it all worth it. She never smiled at me like that before I went to work. :-)
Wednesday, December 25, 2013
I received the following email from the owner of NV Blue, based in San Francisco:
I'd love to hear what you all have to say about her products! Personally, I love this tunic, "The Meagan."
What's more is that Nicole is offering 20% off to my readers with the promo code "TrendSetterMom"
Friday, September 6, 2013
You see, I am 6 1/2 weeks pregnant, and my OB gave me two options to break the hyperemesis gravidarum: Go on bed rest in the hospital, with no computer/cellphone/television/visitor access, and adding food gradually... or... Go home, rest for a week, and avoid most electronics (yes, I am breaking the rules by posting this). It sucks, because I am missing work, and I really want to be at work, and making the money, but I am unable to perform well at work if I am unhealthy and can't keep food or water down. My hyperemesis with Lucie lasted for my entire pregnancy, so my doctor is trying to break the cycle early. So far, his methods are working to at least decrease the morning sickness.
One of my friends was quick to point out the bright side: If I have to be on bed rest... being on bed rest at home in my great big brand new house is definitely a plus! I do love my new house! There were a few things that were missed, such as a TV outlet in the wrong spot, which the builder is in the process of fixing (they have moved the outlet, but that required cutting holes in the walls, so the walls have been spackled, but not yet sanded or re-painted), and the gutters still need to be put on, along with changing out the glass panes on the front and back door to match the rest of the windows... all in all, though, it's a pretty awesome house! ;-)
Monday, August 5, 2013
Today, we are closing on our home in New York. The home we are selling... our first house. Our "starter house"... which is what my dad started calling it before we even bought it. I brushed it off, thinking we would grow old together in that house.
I was wrong, but I am happy that I was wrong. We can grow old together in our *NEW* house... it's so *NEW* it's being built- JUST FOR US! It will have everything I'd ever dreamed of... a master suite with sitting area... separate tub/shower... a water closet (so excited there is a room just for using the toilet- within the bathroom, but closed off, so other people can get ready for work while someone is in there doing their business... so practical!)... and a walk in closet! Oh, and did I mention Jonathan will have a room designated as his "man cave/computer room"? And the kitchen has 42" Cherry Cabinets with oil rubbed bronze handles... granite counter tops... a PANTRY! Gas stove! Fireplace in the living room. A breakfast nook... a formal dining room... HARDWOOD FLOORS!
I thought I loved my New York house, and the truth is, I did... but I wasn't IN love with it. I am IN love with my Columbia house that's being built now. I can't wait until it's ours! But first, we have to say goodbye to our home in Lindenhurst. I will be sad, I will probably cry as I am signing the papers and handing over the keys. But, I will have to just remind myself of the new house, and here are some photos of the progress on that house so far:
Sunday, June 23, 2013
Okay, maybe not too hard. I'm still in training for another month, but so far, I am LOVING my new job. I love everything about customs brokerage, world trade and the transportation of goods. As the world becomes more interdependent, my job becomes even more interesting. ;-)
You may not realize all the items you own that have been imported. That banana you ate for breakfast likely came from South America. Your iPhone is from China. That hair clip you bought from Amazon.com? That came from Hong Kong. What about the clothes you are wearing? They could come from any number of places, and even if they were made where ever it is you live, it's likely that the fabric came from somewhere else. That American car you drive? It has some parts made in Mexico. That oil in your gas tank? That came from the Middle East somewhere.
The world needs people to facilitate the transportation of all these goods smoothly through customs and to the company that will, in turn, sell it to you. That's where I come in as an entry processor. In a nutshell, I enter the goods that are on commercial invoices into the computer and match them to the shipment they are arriving in. I transmit that entry to customs, and if everything is up to snuff, they release the goods after all duties and taxes are paid. I make it sound much simpler than it really is, and in an ideal world, it would be that simple, but every now and then, we have to be thrown a curveball to keep us on our toes.
I still really miss Lucie during the day, but it makes me cherish our time together that much more! I love that kid!